Chasing Cars
by Bryan Greenberg
Summary: If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world? ONESHOT songfic in the middle of 'Partings' Sophie.


Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls. Snow Patrol owns _Chasing Cars_.

**Chasing Cars**

Logan looks down at the woman in his arms as they lay in bed. She is either unwilling or unable to fall asleep. He's familiar with the feeling, not even able to drift off in the post sex haze. He knows this inability is mostly because he doesn't want to miss a moment of her presence when he'll be leaving in a few short hours.

"Hey," he says softly, gently kissing the top of her ear, "What are you thinking about?"

Rory shakes her head. "It's stupid," she mumbles, "You don't need to worry about it."

"I want to worry about it, Ace," he states, "That's what being in a relationship is all about, right?"

She bites her lip, and he can see the pain and longing in her eyes. "I was just thinking about Asia," she says, avoiding his eyes, "I was thinking about just you and me, experiencing life. I told you. It's stupid and selfish. You're going to be in London for a year away from everyone, and all I can think of is that I really wanted us to go to Asia."

He wraps his arms tighter around her. "I really wanted that too," he says, "And I promise we'll get to Asia. Maybe after your graduation."

_We'll do it all   
Everything  
On our own_

"Hey, Ace," he says, and she looks at him expectantly. "I'm sorry. That weekend at the Vineyard, when I told you to keep planning Asia, I didn't think about how if you did, it would make it so much worse when it didn't happen. I'm sorry."

"Oh, Logan," she says, tears filling her eyes, "I didn't keep planning. I knew it wasn't going to happen after that weekend."

"But I asked you about it," Logan says, confused, "You always made it seem like you were still planning."

She shrugs. "You know me," she says, "I'm not a live in the moment kind of girl. I always think about the future. But I couldn't bring myself to tear you from your denial so I pretended I still thought it was happening."

"I thought I brought out the live in the moment side of you," he says, pouting slightly.

"You do," she placates, kissing him gently, "And I love you for that, but it's more of a temporary thing than a permanent change in my personality."__

We don't need  
Anything  
Or anyone

He twines he fingers with hers, wanting to be touching her in any way he can. No amount of contact is enough. His other hand is playing with her hair, a gesture that has become barely noticed by either of the couple due to the frequency with which it occurs.

These are the moments with him she treasures the most. They're the ones she will miss the most, much as she loves bantering with him or sharing the paper as they bicker. It's when they're just quiet and together that she knows she loves him and he loves her. She's never been able to just _be_ with a man before him, and she's glad that it's something the two of them alone share.

This moment, though, is bitter sweet. She wishes she could think of anything but the fact that this has to end. He has to go to London, and she won't see him every day. They won't have these moments. They'll talk on the phone and visit whenever they can, but it won't be the same.

She's unsure when she got so used to living with him, but she doesn't want it to go away.__

If I lay here  
If I just lay here   
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

"So, what are you doing tomorrow?" Logan asks lightly. Rory stares at him like he's crazy. He has to be kidding.

"I don't really have plans," Rory says sarcastically, annoyed and hurt at his nonchalance, "Apparently I should. Since it's any other day."

He kisses her neck gently, trying to placate her. "I didn't mean it like that," he sighs, "I just don't want to picture you crying all day, doing nothing."

She nods and gives him a small smile. She certainly doesn't want to be fighting or annoyed with him right now.

"I'll see if Mom wants to have lunch or something if it makes you feel better," she says, "I'm worried about her anyway. Things are so weird with Luke right now."

He feels kind of bad about it, but he's glad she's worried about her mom. He wants her to have something to focus on, especially over the summer. He knows when school starts, she'll be really busy. He doesn't want her to have too much time to think because he doesn't want her to be hurting because of him.__

I don't quite know   
How to say  
How I feel

She can't help but think of their impending good-bye. She doesn't know what she's going to say to him. Even 'I love you' seems inadequate to express the emotions she is feeling. The words are so small, and what she feels for Logan is all consuming.

She knows planning is futile. The Lorelai Gilmore in her is going to experience verbal diarrhea and she's going to ramble and say something stupid and completely destroy whatever moment they'll have.

"I love you, Logan," she says softly, deciding that, even if it's inadequate, maybe saying it now, and as many times as she can, will make up for whatever stupid thing she says to him in the morning.

"You're everything, Ace," Logan responds, feeling the same insufficiency of words and hoping to express to her how much she means to him.__

Those three words  
Are said too much  
They're not enough

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?  


"Mitchum is wrong," Rory states resolutely, breaking the comfortable silence they have fallen into since Logan's declaration.

"About you?" Logan asks, confused, "Of course he is."

"No," Rory says, "About you. When he asked me on the elevator if I had anything to say to his reasoning for sending you away I just stood there, but he was wrong. What is it about your father that makes my brain and my ability to argue fly out the window?"

"That's his effect on everyone," he says, "But I don't know what the hell you're talking about. What did he say about me on the elevator? When were you on an elevator with him?"

"Earlier today," she says, blushing slightly, "I wasn't going to tell you because you have enough to worry about. But I yelled at him for sending you away. Told him it was because he hates me. He said he was doing it to make you grow up, that you needed to be away from Finn, Colin, and the LDB. He said it was how his father made him grow up. He asked me if I had anything to say to his argument and I just stood there."

"You yelled at my father?" Logan asks, smiling slightly, "I wish I could have seen that."

"You're not going to say anything to his stupid reasoning?" she asks, surprised. She'd thought it would make him as mad as it makes her.

"I figured as much," he says with a shrug.

"But he's wrong," Rory whispers, kissing the palm of his hand, "About all of it. But the part that gets me is he acted like it was some huge justification that it was what his father did to him. But I don't want you to become your father. I can't think of anything worse that could possibly happen."

"Never," Logan says adamantly. He cups her cheek in his hand and gently brushes away the tears that have begun to fall in the past few minutes. "I will never become him," he promises again.

_  
Forget what we're told  
Before we get too old  
Show me a garden that's bursting into life_

Let's waste time  
Chasing cars  
Around our heads

Logan thinks about the fears she has expressed to him. He knows he placated them with his promise. She could never truly believe he would become his father. But he knows not that long ago it was a possibility.

But the minute she walked into his life, that possibility was gone. She has changed him, and he's never been more grateful for anything. She somehow managed to make him grow up and recapture his innocence all at the same time.

Without her, he could have ended up living his life with a wife he could never love or even respect while sleeping around with the same women he slept around with in college. He wouldn't have been happy, but he would have been who everyone expected him to be. He'd been fairly resigned to that fate, only wanting to prolong the inevitable with any opposition.

But then he fell in love with Rory. From Rory, he relearned playfulness. Something he thought he never lost, but his stunts were always rebellion more than play. She taught him simple pleasures and, most importantly, dreams.

While he had been unable to dream of a life away from his father, away from newspapers, he could dream about happiness. He could be happy with that job as long as he didn't take on the life. As long as he didn't become his father. She made what was once an inevitability an impossibility.__

I need your grace  
To remind me  
To find my own

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

He brings his mouth to hers, kissing her deeply in an attempt to express his gratitude for what she's done for him. "Thanks, Ace," he says softly when he pulls away.

"For what?" she asks, cocking her head in confusion.

"For changing me," he explains, "For making me a boyfriend."

"I did nothing," she says.

He gives her a look. "You did everything."

"Well," she says, "Then right back atcha. You've changed me pretty well, yourself, Huntzberger. And they're good changes no matter what my mother or grandparents might have said earlier this year. You taught me the rewards that can come with risk. You showed me that there's more to life than studying and movie marathons, much as I still love those things."

"Then I guess we're pretty good for each other," he says, kissing her.

"I…guess…so," she says between kisses.

He grins, kissing her more deeply and rolling on top of her.

_Forget what we're told  
Before we get too old  
Show me a garden that's bursting into life_

All that I am  
All that I ever was  
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see  


He wants to memorize her every feature. The gentle slope of her cheek, the perfect curve of her lips. But especially the endless blue of her eyes. They're the only eyes that have ever truly seen potential in him.

She saw that he didn't have to be just another arrogant rich boy. She saw past every defense mechanism he had, tearing down walls as they got to know each other. She saw _him_. He likes to think he sees her in a way no one else does too. She knows he does.

_  
I don't know where  
Confused about how as well  
Just know that these things will never change for us at all_

"Logan," Rory says, "Can I tell you something without freaking you out?"

"Always," he replies sincerely.

"Ok," she says, taking a deep breath. She's nervous but she doesn't want him to go away without knowing this. "That weekend at the Vineyard, before everything went awful, I was talking to my mom about how weird it was that maybe we were there with our 'ones.' In the soul mate sense of the word."

She looks at him, trying to see if he's freaking out yet, before she continues. "When I said it, I thought that Luke was definitely Mom's one and, out of the four of us, that you and I were more likely to not last. And it's weird because now, everything is so up in the air with Mom and Luke and I've never been more certain that you're my forever."

His breath catches in his throat. He knows this is probably supposed to freak him out, but it doesn't. Because, even if it hadn't become a tangible thought to him before now, he knows he can't imagine his life without her. He doesn't want to.

"Are you freaking out?" Rory asks tentatively when he doesn't speak for a while.

"No," he says, pressing his mouth to hers reassuringly, "Processing maybe. But in a good way. I want nothing more than for you to be my forever."

Rory smiles at him and feels herself drifting. She is no longer able to fight sleep no matter how much she wants to just to be with him for a little bit longer.

The next thing she knows, Logan is waking her up and telling her he has to leave for the airport, telling her she can't come with him to see him off. She's saying stupid things, but she always knew she would because nothing is enough, nothing is right. Watching him as the elevator doors close the fact that they have their forevers to be together is small comfort.

_  
If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?_

AN- If you haven't heard this song, you seriously need to. It's pretty much the most beautiful and hopeful song I've ever heard and I hope the fic did it some semblance of justice. I promise this is my last oneshot before updating ALL of my fics.


End file.
